Here’s a bit of their conversation (paraphrased of course…)
MOM #1: “If I had to do it all over again, I would go to college; I wouldn’t have kids so young…”
MOM #2: “Me too. Look at [reference to a friend], she went to college and got out of Delaware. And look at their kids. I hear her daughter is doing well in Florida too.”
MOM #1: “I don’t know what to do with my kids. Everyday it’s something. I don’t even want to think about college.”
MOM #2: “Yeah, we don’t have the money.”
Needless to say the conversation continued. At moments, I wanted to interject but I didn’t want to come off as some eaves dropping lunatic or some overzealous woman in Wal-Mart dying to add my two cents to their conversation, but had I mustered up the courage to speak, I would have said this:
There are all moments in our lives that we wish we could recant. Even in instances when there are legal ramifications, we get second chances. Life offers us a series of opportunities to make right the things we can’t seem to live with. It’s never too late to tackle a challenge that may have been mastered with ease in your youth. Getting a college education regardless of age is a 21st century requirement. It is nearly impossible to achieve success without a degree [or two]. For the past several years, I have the pleasure of teaching non-traditional students who proudly graduate with their children and relish in the fact that when ‘life’ happened they rolled with the punches and stayed focused on educational attainment…regardless of whether it took a decade or two (and yes I’ve had students who labored for decades to complete an undergraduate degree).
As far as looking at others and standing in envy of their accomplishments; DON’T. Your life is what is important. Setting goals based on what other’s are doing is a surefire way to end up facing failure and darkening your spirit as you try to accomplish feats that are not heartfelt.
There are a lot of things that I’d like to do over if I had the chance again. (I'd list them but some are way too embarassing and I still feel a sense of shame just thinking about dumb mistakes or careless actions of the past). But when you get a moment, think about the thing(s) that most impacted your life in the past and how much ‘a do over’ would enhance your life in the here and now. You may have the resources (time, money, energy) to do that thing over but if you don’t, how do you move forward? You start be reflecting on and treasuring the experiences of the past; regardless of the positive or negative impact of those experiences. Second, set realistic goals that you can accomplish on your own terms and third, have faith and patience through the process. This is not the only recipe for success, but if you don’t try something you’ll never get beyond wishing for a chance to do it over again.
