If they're good enough to raise your children they're good enough to receive the financial support too

As we near the start of another school year I pondered what to blog about: Ferguson. The article my husband shared with me about not blaming  black parents for underachieving kids or the article I read about putting the public back into public education.

As the school year starts there are two people in my life that are starting over, as parents that is.  For the last year so these two individuals have been raising two of their nieces.

Grandparents (or older family members on fixed incomes) raising kids is not a new trend.  According to the U.S. Census over 2.4 million grandparents have responsibility for their grandchildren. Grandparents often have legal difficulties related to obtaining guardianship, enrolling their grandchildren in school, and accessing medical care for their grandchildren. They may also have concerns related to custody battles with other grandparents or their grandchildren’s parents.  Because they often have limited financial resources, grandparents may experience difficulty providing adequate housing, food, and clothing.

The financial aspect of starting all over to raise children is probably the most frustrating. In many instances the biological parents continue to receive public assistance or financial assistance for their children but choose not to turn any of these services over to the individual now responsible for raising their children.  To make matters worse this couple is functioning in a family court system that doesn't make the process of transferring any financial support that the biological parents have to the new relatives who have legally assumed custody a smooth process.

As this willing couple goes through the school vaccination process, shops for new clothes and school supplies the biological parents choose to keep any and all state support for themselves.  Like most grandparents or adults faced with the situation they're trying to work through the system to get all the financial support needed to take care of the children but they find themselves in paperwork hell. The same court system that quickly granted them custody of the children now makes it challenging for them to get the money that they need to take care of these two little girls.

Sure, this couple and others like them who are taking care of their grandchildren or other young relative will make a way but you have to ask yourself where is the accountability. When a parent knowingly signs over legal custody of their children they should also sign over any financial assistance that they are receiving. It's only fair.

In my heart I know that these individuals were chosen to take on this responsibility not just by the biological parents but by a higher being. God has a way of entrusting his lambs with those shepherds in the community who will give their all to make sure those lambs are safe, but all those shepherds need support.

I've had my share of experiences in the family court system as someone who stood by my husband as he managed some challenging family court issues and I'll be the first to say that things have to change.

Grandparents and other retirees should be enjoying life; taking dance lessons, traveling the world, enjoying their retired or semi retired lives but that's not the case. Buying diapers, participating in the PTA, becoming a soccer parent all over  again is becoming a norm for many older Americans.  Their lives  have changed and now they're faced with the question of whether to commit resources to battling a court system or if they should invest those funds into the young lives that they now responsible for shaping and molding.

As the school year begins and as I turn in supplies for my own kids along with the list of community classroom supplies I think about the faces that are in that classroom and wonder how many grandparents are raising kids, how many aunts are raising nieces how many uncles are pitching in. My heart goes out to each and everyone of them as they try to make a good life for the child that they now call their own.

I pray that these individuals have the strength and courage and the resources to continue to fight the system so that every month financial resources won't be going to biological parents who have chosen to be absent; who have chosen to no longer have the responsibility of taking care of the children that they brought into this world. I also hope that the future brings legislation that will automatically transfer support if a biological parent willingly gives up the rights to parent their children.

Until that time we all need to step up to the plate to help those in need especially when we have families members on fixed or retired incomes that willingly take on the responsibility to start all over
and raise someone else's children.