I'm watching the Today Show and I see a promo for a special Proctor and Gamble program focusing on how mothers raise Olympians. Touchy-feely images of moms in the crowd supporting their children, picking up skaters as they fall, hoisting gold medals...you know, the typical tear-jerking images. Americana and competitive sports at its best. I hear the commentator say "mother's don't get the recognition they deserve..." to that I stand there with a blank face. "Really." I say aloud as I look across the room to my husband who's applying lotion on the ashy legs of our four year old.
Now that's someone who doesn't get the recognition he deserves...my husband, along with thousands of other husbands and dads who sacrifice everything not just for Olympic dreams but for all the dreams their children have; no matter how big or how small.
This isn't the first time that Proctor and Gamble has paid homage to moms. It was done at the summer Olympics. Why wasn't I as reflective about this during the summer? I'm not sure. Maybe it's because there's more hype, celebrity and a stronger following during the summer Olympics forcing the human-interest stories of this nature to take a back seat but the fact remains that once again, dads seem to be forgotten.
As someone who pursued a kinda-sorta Olympic dream (I was a competitive gymnast from grade six until my freshman year of college) I remember my father being in the trenches in a different way. Sure my mom drove me to Beltsville, Maryland to the Prince George's Gymnastics Club three times a week and on weekends. She either sat in the car or on the hard bleachers and watched as I tumbled, fumbled, fractured and once competed with a concussion. She wasn't there to wipe my tears or baby me, she was tougher than the coaches at times, but none of it would have been possible without my father, who paid the gym tuition. Even in the 80s and 90s I remember my parents talking about the nearly $1,000.00 a month that went towards my budding gymnastics career. My dad didn't always go to the meets but when he did, you could tell that he was the proudest father there. I'll never forget the first time I scored a perfect 10 in vault. It was dad and his brother who cheered the loudest.
My dad was a quiet man (with a wonderfully quick and sarcastic sense of humor, to which I say THANK YOU) but he always found time to tell me how proud he was of me. Now it may not have been in a traditional form "I'm so proud of you Franny," but he say things like "I saw you out there...how'd you learn to do that?" or he'd say "I see all that practice is paying off." I knew what it meant.
Just because some of them don't cry when you win or lose, they're not the ones kissing dirty boo boos or putting band aids on a Red Power Ranger toy (which I did last week) doesn't mean that dads aren't on "TEAM ALL ABOUT MY KIDS". They are. I think it's so easy to focus on mothers, because matriarchy is often associated with a hands-on form of nurturing and support. In recent years, there has been a cultural shift in which men are taking on more non-traditional roles in the home and are not necessarily showing us a 'new' type of dad, but are probably doing what they are innately able to do...love, nurture and care for their children.
I'm sure there will be tons of dads in Sochi and I'm hoping they they get a moment to shine.
Mahogany Mom is a Blog about one African American Mom's Journey. My goal is simple; to share a piece of myself that will help other women, encourage discourse, critical thought and commentary, at times make readers laugh, and most importantly be a voice that shows women that they do not have to be afraid to embrace their lived experiences. (Photos courtesy Kylene Cleaver - Leave it to Me Photography)
